virtualvoyages: Young woman with brown hair, almond eyes, and a slightly rounded face (Novani)
I'm now a full fledged Jedi, although I still have so many questions I'm not sure I'm worthy of that title, yet.  Master Yuon is gravely ill, and I'm accompanying her to Coruscant, where surely they can save her.  Qyzen is here, too.  Not only is he worried about Master Yuon, but he's decided I'm the Herald of the Scorekeeper - the Trandoshan goddess.

I don't know how I feel about that.  I'm flattered, though I shouldn't be, but Qyzen has seen and done so much that it means a lot for him to think so highly of me.  And it seems even more arrogant to be sure he's wrong.  Perhaps a young Jedi could gain the favor of his goddess, maybe even as a way for her to help him.  Poor Qyzen felt so dishonored by being captured alive by Nalan, I was really worried about him for a while.  Being captured alive is the worst thing that can happen to a Trandoshan.  But now, he feels he can regain his honor - his points - by accompanying me.  I can't actually think of a better guide and teacher, now, than Master Yuon herself, if she recovers.  No, she must recover.  She's too wise and too important.  And I like her.

Though something of a Jedi can remain after death.  I spoke to Rajivari.  To his...his force ghost.  He wasn't what I expected.  He helped me to stop Nalan, and he gave me a lot to think about.

I've done so much.  The Council agreed to help Nalan, and the pilgrims, and even, in a way, the Flesh Raiders.  And yet, there's still so much I don't know and so many things I don't quite understand.  But with the Force and Qyzen to guide me, maybe I can be everything I'd hoped a Jedi could be.

virtualvoyages: Young woman with brown hair, almond eyes, and a slightly rounded face (Novani)
I know we're supposed to be serene, never passionate, but forbidding love seems wrong.  Love is a good thing, isn't it?  And if you don't love - if you don't care about people - isn't that the Dark Side?  I don't understand.

And some of the masters are... not what I expected.  They're so judgmental and... I don't know.  They're more like bureaucrats than scholars.  It doesn't feel right.

I'm so confused.

Why doesn't the council allow us to properly protect the Twi'lek pilgrims?  I know they're here illegally, but that shouldn't matter.  And if we had, then one wouldn't have stolen Rajivari's holocron and be going down the dark path.  Doesn't that make it our fault?  Something we should have prevented?

I will have to meditate.  Or ask my master.  Or one of the other masters who are more like what I expected.  Maybe Master Quilb or Master Till'in.  Maybe they can make it seem right.

virtualvoyages: Young woman with brown hair, almond eyes, and a slightly rounded face (Novani)
I arrived on Tython today to begin my training as a Jedi.  I'm so excited, it's all I can do not to go around grinning.  I must try to remember that passion is not the Jedi way.  But it's so hard.  This is what I've wanted, all my life.  And I'm finally here!

The planet is beautiful and Master Yuon Par seems very nice.  I think I'll like training with her.  The only bad thing is that there are savages here, called Flesh Raiders, who are a threat to the temple and us students.  We're safe enough in groups or with our masters, but alone it can be dangerous.

Still, I'm so happy to be here!  No, I must remember that I will be a Jedi.  I must meditate and learn to remain calm, no matter how happy I am.  There is no passion, there is serenity.


virtualvoyages: an old worn book on a black back ground, a glow at one corner of the book (Default)

March 2016

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